Book Review: How to Slowly Kill Yourself and Others in America

 

 

Image: The cover of the book is a mottled white background with lettering in the style of being hand written with marker in black. Across the top in two rows is "Kiese Laymon." Next to Kiese, in smaller letters is "Essays by the award winning author of heavy" and written sideways, "revised edition." The other 2/3 of the cover is blank in the center with the title of the book written around the edge in a square, changing position and direction as it turns each corner. There are accents of light blue, yellow, orange, purple and green on some of the letters while others are only black. Along the bottom in smaller letters is the quote, "I was stunned into stillness." -Roxane Gay.

Kiese Laymon's "How to Slowly Kill Yourself and Others in America" is the revised edition of a book by the same name first published back in 2013. You may be thinking that this means it's a reprint of essentially the same book, perhaps with a new introduction or footnote here and there like so many revised and new editions end up being. That is not the case. If you read the old version, you did not read this book. Laymon went through hell to have his voice heard and for the ability to write and publish his work without it being torn apart in the worst nonconstructive ways. This resulted in a fight to get his own work back from the publisher, which ended with him paying them 10 times what they paid him for it. Many of the writings in the book surround current or recent events such as existing in a post-covid-19 world and living under Trump's reign of terrors, while others draw from the original.

From the start, this book is composed of amazing, honest, powerful, and poetic writing. Reading the struggles that Laymon has had just to exist as a Black southern writer is disheartening and seeing him succeed is a blessing. Being that I consider him to be one of the best writers alive today, I am left wondering just how many others we miss out on hearing from due to similar experiences to that which Laymon details in several essays of the book. Along with the barriers to writing and publishing, Laymon describes many other experiences in which being a Black, southern writer is at the center. Laymon is misled, scammed, and repeatedly told that the only way to make it anywhere as a "real black writer," is to tamper down or disappear "racial politics" and to frame any that remain with whiteness at the center. I was left wondering throughout the book what those editors and publishers are thinking now. 

Outside of publishing struggles and successes, Laymon touches on many more topics and experiences. These include that of his and others youth, adulthood, family, friends, police, punishment, freedom, enjoyment, liberation, and many others. There are a few moments where Kiese comments on peoples bodies in ways that make me bristle, but with how open he has been about struggling with eating disorders, it makes sense in that light. One of my favorite entries, "Echo: Mychal, Darnell, Kiese, Kai, and Marlon," surprised me because I am usually not a huge fan of reading printed conversations between people. But, this entry composed of letters sent to one another by the group was moving in big ways. So many different types of people shared their experiences and wisdom. Laymon also touches on common topics that exist around struggles of racial oppression, such as violent encounters with cruel. racist cops regardless of (lack of) wrongdoing, sexual assault survival, the struggles of Black men and women and how they differ, domestic violence and abuse, mental health and addiction, struggle to get an education regardless of exceptional merit, and others. Laymon's handling of these topics however stands out in truly special ways. He has a way of making the story telling and conversations feel fresh and about as real as the written word can. "Our Kind Of Ridiculous," is affecting in big ways I can't really describe. I can feel Laymon's writing when I read it despite coming from a very different demographic and history.

One of the things I like best about Laymon's work is his ability to capture nuance and the utter messiness of human beings. There are no one-dimensional characters living in Laymon's books. He writes about human beings and the realities of life in all of their glory, terror, banality, and joy. He is truly one of the most honest writers out there. To combine such honesty with such talent is quite a feat worthy of praise.

This was also posted to my goodreads.