To my knowledge, To My Trans Sisters is the first book of its kind: An anthology of letters written by trans women, and a few other trans identified AMAB people, written for the same demographic. I will begin this review saying that I am not the target audience of this book. I am a trans person, but of the AFAB, butch/genderqueer/transmasculine persuasion. That said, I was still inspired by the advice many women in this book gave. Many of their stories are unique to trans women and femmes, but many are those that all kinds of trans and gender nonconforming people can relate to. Cisgender people (non-trans people) will gain insight into the lives and experiences of many women who share their stories in this book. Most people will recognize at least a few of the names in the book and people who have been part of LGBTQ communities and who follow LGBTQ Western media may recognize many of the names. It was lovely to see women from so many different backgrounds come together to send a message to other women and trans femmes out there.
One of the main strengths of this book is the sheer range of diverse experiences expressed by the women whose stories were included. From what I could tell, ages ranged from teenage to eighties. There were voices from countries from most continents on Earth (though it is very heavy on English (UK) representation because that's where the editor is from.) There are women who are activists, physicists, athletes, programmers, artists, military personnel, celebrity reality show participants, musicians, politicians, doctors, dancers, and many others. There are women of many different racial backgrounds and many different ages of transition. Disability is underrepresented, but Emily Brothers' letter- along with her acknowledgement about how disability and illness compound struggles to obtain medical transition- was very nice to see as a disabled trans person. While the book does heavily highlight the voices of famous and wealthy trans people, there is still a wide range of experiences among them and other voices included as well.
One of the main strengths of this book is the sheer range of diverse experiences expressed by the women whose stories were included. From what I could tell, ages ranged from teenage to eighties. There were voices from countries from most continents on Earth (though it is very heavy on English (UK) representation because that's where the editor is from.) There are women who are activists, physicists, athletes, programmers, artists, military personnel, celebrity reality show participants, musicians, politicians, doctors, dancers, and many others. There are women of many different racial backgrounds and many different ages of transition. Disability is underrepresented, but Emily Brothers' letter- along with her acknowledgement about how disability and illness compound struggles to obtain medical transition- was very nice to see as a disabled trans person. While the book does heavily highlight the voices of famous and wealthy trans people, there is still a wide range of experiences among them and other voices included as well.
Another one of the book's strengths is the vast range of opinions expressed on gender, womanhood, transition, gender expression, passing, sexuality, and so on. Due to generational, geographical, cultural, and other differences, there is a wide range of terms people use for themselves and their experiences. But, there are also a wide range of tips allowing the reader to take what they need and leave the rest. Some women say to tone down your look in order to pass, others say to look however extravagantly you like and ignore the haters. Some women say they were very supported when they came out, others say they lost everything. Some women have very traditional trans narratives, others have more fluid experiences of gender.
Regardless of these differences between entries though, there is a common thread that runs through all of them: Sisterhood, an insistence on the great value of the women and other trans people who are their target audience, and a message that being who they are is right no matter what anyone else says. Regardless of their differences, all of the writers in this book express a love for and solidarity with their target audience. Other more common pieces of advice that ran through many writings were making sure being transgender doesn't become everything in your life, to still hold on to things you enjoy, to never settle for an abusive partner because you are trans, and also not to assume that everyone in the world is ridiculing- or even paying attention to- you. It was nice to see these messages of hope tie together such a wide range of peoples experiences.
I thought hard about whether or not I wanted to critique the voices of trans women in a book that I was not the target audience for. I decided that I would tread cautiously. So, what I will say is this: There are quite a few women in high ranking military positions in this book who have very pro-military messages that do not line up with many messages I have heard from LGBTQ people (and women in general) in military or related fields who were out or outed. These type of messages, as well as messages coming from women who successfully feigned hyper-masculinity, amassed great wealth and rose to the top of a male-only or male-dominated fields before coming out or transitioning may upset or simply not apply to trans women/girls and other trans people reading this who are poor, of color, who were always clocked as femme/gay/gender nonconforming, or who have otherwise not had the same privileges or access. That said, I realize that there is a place for these voices as there are women right now who are in the same position, waiting to come out, who need that last little push from someone who is in the same position as them. I also realize that privilege and even a neoliberal or conservative political bent does not mean a woman's experience is not valid. Furthermore, women in these positions tended to address and be well aware of the difference between themselves and a poor girl who began transition at 15 or something. I will limit my criticism to that paragraph.
Another thing I noted while reading the book is that a few of the entries mention that they were asked by Charlie Craggs (the editor) to write a letter to their younger selves. However, only a few of the 85 letters included in the book followed this model. I really wish that more of the letters would have followed this model as some are very short and I really wanted to hear more from those people. I am not sure if it was lack of resources, organization, or just being able to get what she got from people. I would have liked to read a book with fewer entries if it was a little more cohesive in this way and a bit better edited, and that is why I am giving it 4 stars out of 5.
Overall, I am happy this book exists and happy to have read it. I believe it could bring some joy and companionship in the sea of loneliness one can sometimes feel living as a trans person in the world. I am very grateful to all of the women and other trans people who shared their letters in the book and to Craggs for taking on this project.
Also posted to my goodreads.
Regardless of these differences between entries though, there is a common thread that runs through all of them: Sisterhood, an insistence on the great value of the women and other trans people who are their target audience, and a message that being who they are is right no matter what anyone else says. Regardless of their differences, all of the writers in this book express a love for and solidarity with their target audience. Other more common pieces of advice that ran through many writings were making sure being transgender doesn't become everything in your life, to still hold on to things you enjoy, to never settle for an abusive partner because you are trans, and also not to assume that everyone in the world is ridiculing- or even paying attention to- you. It was nice to see these messages of hope tie together such a wide range of peoples experiences.
I thought hard about whether or not I wanted to critique the voices of trans women in a book that I was not the target audience for. I decided that I would tread cautiously. So, what I will say is this: There are quite a few women in high ranking military positions in this book who have very pro-military messages that do not line up with many messages I have heard from LGBTQ people (and women in general) in military or related fields who were out or outed. These type of messages, as well as messages coming from women who successfully feigned hyper-masculinity, amassed great wealth and rose to the top of a male-only or male-dominated fields before coming out or transitioning may upset or simply not apply to trans women/girls and other trans people reading this who are poor, of color, who were always clocked as femme/gay/gender nonconforming, or who have otherwise not had the same privileges or access. That said, I realize that there is a place for these voices as there are women right now who are in the same position, waiting to come out, who need that last little push from someone who is in the same position as them. I also realize that privilege and even a neoliberal or conservative political bent does not mean a woman's experience is not valid. Furthermore, women in these positions tended to address and be well aware of the difference between themselves and a poor girl who began transition at 15 or something. I will limit my criticism to that paragraph.
Another thing I noted while reading the book is that a few of the entries mention that they were asked by Charlie Craggs (the editor) to write a letter to their younger selves. However, only a few of the 85 letters included in the book followed this model. I really wish that more of the letters would have followed this model as some are very short and I really wanted to hear more from those people. I am not sure if it was lack of resources, organization, or just being able to get what she got from people. I would have liked to read a book with fewer entries if it was a little more cohesive in this way and a bit better edited, and that is why I am giving it 4 stars out of 5.
Overall, I am happy this book exists and happy to have read it. I believe it could bring some joy and companionship in the sea of loneliness one can sometimes feel living as a trans person in the world. I am very grateful to all of the women and other trans people who shared their letters in the book and to Craggs for taking on this project.
Also posted to my goodreads.
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